BOONE, NC — Sparking concern and suspicion on campus, a new study commissioned by the World Health Organization revealed Friday that roughly one in three man buns in Boone is actually a “gross parasitic head monster thing”.

The study found that those afflicted were often unaware that the clump of hair atop their heads was actually a pulsating, gelatinous monstrosity feeding on their brain matter, and that few were even worried when the man buns showed up seemingly of their own free will.

“I don’t know, man. When I woke up one morning with a flawless man bun, I just figured it was part of the changes that every new resident here undergoes,” Carter Harris, an Appalachian State freshman, spoke of the phenomenon. “I just thought this meant I was becoming a man.”

In the wake of the study, scientists are growing increasingly alarmed by how quickly the parasite is spreading across campus.

“It was honestly kind of strange,” Harris said.  “Literally like a day after I got my man-bun, my roommate got one too. Then the guy next door, and then even my RA.”

“I figured they just dug my style. Can’t say I blame them, it’s pretty dope.  My head really itches though.”

At press time, Harris was unable to comment further as the parasitic beast had consumed his brain’s auditory cortex.