adjunct-professorBOONE, NC – Panic has just stricken Physics professor Nathan Miller as he is growing ever closer to the point in today’s lecture about which he knows absolutely nothing.

“Oh man, this is definitely going to suck,” the professor thought to himself, having meant to research the upcoming chapter last night but then friends came over and of course the Grammys happened. “I don’t even have a single PowerPoint slide prepared or anything.”

Not wanting to be reprimanded for being unprepared, Professor Miller tried to devise a plan of action while he asked his students once more if they had any questions regarding what had been discussed so far this semester. “I guess I could always just make up a bunch of crap and try my best to pass it off as legit facts,” the professor considered as he quickly weighed his options. “Ugh, but then that know-it-all Jerry Schweigert might catch me again.”

“Now if only there were some video I could show that might relate to Newton’s Laws,” he thought to himself as he tried to figure out how on Earth it was possible that there were still 35 minutes of class time remaining.  “Perhaps that could kill a bit of time, and then I can just feign illness or something for the rest of class.”

Latest reports indicate that Professor Miller was showing his class a hardly-relevant School House Rock video while he discreetly looked up the symptoms of measles.