11198377_10206607437730447_722577959_nBOONE, NC – Following a period of deliberation and thorough examination, App State’s Sociology Department revealed Friday that Tom is a gargantuan dick.

According to Susan Corrigan, department chair and head of the research team responsible for asserting the 24-year-old’s jerkish character, Tom’s douchebaggery is unrivaled by anyone on campus.

“We’ve performed a variety of specialized studies on Tom, and it’s clear that he embodies every humanly trait of an enormous asshole,” affirmed Corrigan, adding that he rarely tips at restaurants and frequently double parks. “We also acquired Tom’s phone records and discovered several shirtless mirror pictures, which provides conclusive evidence that Tom is simply a jackass.”

“His trollish face. His stupid haircut. His hunky arms. God, screw everything about that guy,” Corrigan added.

Corrigan and her research team were able to perform several isolated sociological studies on Tom after convincing him to participate with the threat of expulsion from Appalachian. Even while conducting the studies, researchers found themselves wanting to knock him out.

“If simply just being in his presence made me want to pummel him with a shovel, then he’s got to be an unprecedented ass,” said senior Sociology major Curtis Mayfield. “He wouldn’t even put down his copy of Muscle and Fitness magazine the entire time we were forcing him to participate in our studies.”

The Sociology Department’s breakthrough research on Tom can be found in this month’s issue of American Sociological Review.