Uncategorized

Straight Edge Student Uses 4/20 As Yet Another Opportunity To Tell Everyone She Doesn’t Smoke

Straight Edge Student Uses 4/20 As Yet Another Opportunity To Tell Everyone She Doesn’t Smoke

BOONE, NC– Jumping at the opportunity to flaunt her superiority over others, straight edge student Danielle Carmen is making it a point on 4/20 to remind everyone around her that she doesn’t smoke. “Wow, is it really 4/20 already? That’s crazy! I don’t even smoke though,” Carmen said matter-of-factly to the janitor cleaning the LLC’s bathroom, explaining that she always[Read More…]

April 20, 2017 Student-Life, Uncategorized
Business Professor Particularly Excited For Slide 36

Business Professor Particularly Excited For Slide 36

BOONE, NC– Trying his absolute best to keep his emotions in check during his Principles of Accounting class, App State professor Paul Jackson is reportedly particularly excited for the upcoming slide 36. “It’s all about stockholder’s equity. I cannot wait to show it to them,” Jackson said, adding that he has not been this excited for a slide since slide[Read More…]

March 10, 2017 Uncategorized

Student Travels Home To Visit Dog One Final Time Before He Stops Caring About It

February 28, 2017 Uncategorized

University Therapist Trying To Subtly Inform Student That He’s Getting Pretty Annoying

February 28, 2017 Uncategorized

Student Sets Record Time On One-Mile Drive To Krispy Kreme

February 28, 2017 Uncategorized

Roommate Takes Only Good Chair In Living Room Back To His Room

February 28, 2017 Uncategorized

Priceless Heirloom Sold For Approximately Two Days Worth Of Food

February 28, 2017 Uncategorized

Student’s Excuses Now Losing Flair They Once Had At Start Of Semester

February 28, 2017 Uncategorized

Frosted Flakes Apparently Least Flammable Food In Apartment

February 28, 2017 Uncategorized

Tardy Student Carrying Starbucks Claims “Sorry, Traffic”

February 7, 2017 Uncategorized