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Earth, Milky Way Galaxy– Growing collectively more tired as Tuesday dragged on, humanity reportedly managed to make it through yet another rotation on Earth’s axis. Although most of the 8 billion human inhabitants on the planet had an overall pleasant day, some experienced turmoil. “Yeah, I had a couple tests and an essay due today, so it was pretty shitty,” said student Rachael Blanton, unaware that she is entirely unoriginal in her fruitless plight against the forces of time that will eventually render any and all struggles she has ever and will ever endure completely unimportant in the grand scheme of existence, while simultaneously ignoring the fact that once she’s dead, her memory will slowly fade into nothingness until no one knows that someone named ‘Rachael Blanton’ ever existed. “I can’t wait to curl up with a good book and wait for the inevitability of tomorrow.” At press time, reporters were told that homosapiens were projected to inhabit the Earth for at least the length of another day, for better or for worse.